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Vandalism At The OLDBAG!

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Last night, an act of wanton vandalism took place in our cherished museum (The OLDBAG).......
Security cameras captured this bogus security guard in the act of burning a hole through the eye of the handsome subject (who just happens to be me) of this priceless painting.........Ear-witnesses report hearing a man running out the back door, shouting "Green coconuts, green coconuts" and laughing uncontrollably......
Any information would be greatly appreciated..........THE OLDBAG WILL NOT TAKE THIS ASSAULT ON HER DIGNITY LYING DOWN!

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lelabugosi

Well yes....and possibly, maybe, probably still do in Alamaba........

twoclubs

But why not Lela? Why not both at once? Didn't hermaphrodites live among us once long ago before BongaBonga developed?

lelabugosi

Yes, in Alabama you could be your own grandfather/grandmother.......(not both at once, of course).....

Elfie

In Alabama they still have chain gangs!!

octomom

And in Alabama, you never know who the girl's father or grandfather is. Could be the baby daddy too...

gemstone

Gee, if I lived in Alabama I could almost be a great great great grandmother by now! Am I my own grandma? :DDD

patsquire

lelabug, gracious host, you and so many others have wished for so long to get a glimpse of my beautiful physiognomy, that I thought I'd hammer home the wisdom of the adage, "Be careful what you wish for. You may get it."

Shinymonth, my dear, you might please remember that I live in Alabama, where the average age of grandparents is between 28 and 29. Besides, with the state of modern cosmetics (and cosmetic surgery) I may look this young forever!

Elfie

Wonderful, Lela - it gives two new words to the dictionary!!

lelabugosi

Yes, Hanne....it means I am confuddled and confused.....
Mr.Gourmet.........Why don't you give him a call, on his 'Get-Lucky' number?.......

Robbiel

I think the cellphones give quite a charming aura to Squire.

Elfie

It's a great word, can't we give it a meaning????

lelabugosi

Ah yes.......I'm not too sure myself.....well, not at all sure actually.....in fact I don't even think there's such a word!........
(Still, it show's you are paying attention, Hanne-with-pipe!).....

Elfie

Filigibetted?????

lelabugosi

Well...I am flabbergasted....flummoxed......filigibetted, by this startling image!.......Pee Le-Squirt, a 'Screaming Queen' no less!...........with a head full of cellphones.......
Life is a mystery.......

Elfie

You look brilliant Patsy!!

juneshone

Dear Doctor you could try sending your bill to Jignut other than that I am not KBoy's guardian and he really stopped being a boy a long time ago so no loco parentis. Come to think of it he does have parents you could try them.

Dear Mr Squire is that a very old photo or are you a lot younger than a grandfather has any right to be?

patsquire

Ooooooohhhh, octonanomomulator, you are SO perceptive and you still know me SO well. Sure I do, I really do look like this . . . . . FOR NOW! Later? In a while? Heh-heh, maybe I'll really reveal my real self in real reality! HA! And HA!

For now, to let all of Bugosiland get used to the idea that I'm really real, I'm paying homage to our dear, lost wandering soul gawldarn. For this surely is a look she would have appreciated, and it's what I've been wearing since last Mardi Gras anyway.

octomom

I see the P-Squirt finally had the, er, guts to post a photo of himself online. He really does look like that. For now... hee hee...

sweetlittleoldgranny

Oh, uncle/doctor Adonis.......you must help poor Kaleidoboy!........He's never been away so long on his own, and he doesn't even have a change of underwear......he's always been such a clean boy, also, as well, too......he'll be missing his mug of cocoa before he goes to sleep, and his 'big picture book of adventure stories for little men'........

ab_bugosi

Ahem...Madame June, please be advised that the implications of what you're implying could imply complications. No black arts here milady, and no Kaleidoboy either. I do wish you'd telephoned my surgery earlier, my records show that Master Kaleido did not arrive for his appointment and my secretary has been trying to find out where to send the invoice for the non-arrival fee ever since - would that be to your address perchance? I shall of course, await your response prior to instructing her, and look forward to catching up with you sometime - it's been way too long my dear.

juneshone

er Dr Adonis, the boy was alright until I waved him off for his appointment with the Doctor and I never saw him again, sniff! Is the doctor in cahoots with the black arts, always thought there was something of the night about him.

Elfie

Oh jignut, give him both, make it one for the tiger and one more for the horse!!!

lelabugosi

I won't ask which 'certain parts'............

jignut

News Flash! KBoy has morphed again.The backward spell seems to be working. He almost looks like his "old self" except for a tiger tail and certain parts of the horse. I would post his picture but the puzzle police would delete it immediately. Right now he is trying to decide what he wants for lunch....a fresh chicken or hay.

lelabugosi

Hanne, yes....that would be the D.O.L.L.S. (Disorders Of Lackadaisical Lobe Surgery) House.......maybe we should send him/it there, to be under the care of Dr.Adonis B.B.......

juneshone

what an odd idea, wonder if it would work. Maybe we will never know since we don't have him any more just this horgerman creature

gemstone

Maladaptive huminals...perhaps PSquirt would take KBoy in?

Elfie

Isn't there some institution for maladaptive huminals in Bonga-Bonga??

juneshone

poor old Bradley has had a traumatic enough time last year, no way will cakes let KBoy anywhere near him. she won't want to look after him either

lelabugosi

Oh dear!.....That boy has led such a traumatic life.........He was rescued by sweetlittleoldgranny when he was trapped inside a kaleidoscope......and now he doesn't know his arse from his elbow!.........
Yes, maybe cakes will take him in.......he can walk Bradley........

Elfie

WOW, WHAT HAPPENED???

jignut

Maybe we could send him to cakes?

jignut

http://www.jigidi.com/created.php?id=TLJQQ64N

cakes1947

OMG!! June, I can't stop laughing at your comment about preference of male!!! LOL

jignut

I'm really sorry Juneee. I am a bit rusty on spells. Kboy is beginning to scare me with those big fangs.I am going to try again only chanting the spells backwards on a full moon. I wish Granny Sybil was here to help me......on second thought maybe not. That is another story.

juneshone

see that proves it, you are what you eat, or will be. I told him no junk food and does he listen, even saw him eating a cupcake once.

Witzend

I understand he may have been eating Shergar burgers from a certain supermarket recently, hence the transformation.

juneshone

depends if you like horsemen! I prefer a guy with two legs and ten toes who doesn't crap as he walks

Elfie

If that fellow is Kboy it's the best he has been looking ever!!! - I think!!

Robbiel

Wow you sound mad June, poor Wicca is probably dancing a jig on nut's head right now!!!

juneshone

how dare you say we have KBoy back, that creature is not setting foot inside my door. You're sacked! Lela Jignut has an animal who would love your green carrots, he's all hers. I am going to arrange for a service of remembrance, even churchlady is invited and then I will have closure, and don't bring that horses ass anywhere near

Robbiel

Not yet uncle, will let you know........Carrots indeed!!............You silly man!!

lelabugosi

As I commented.....Juneee will NOT be amused!.....

jignut

We have KBoy back again.....sort of. I almost got it right but I think I might have gotten some horse hair in the potion. He had to be moved directly to the barn because he refuses to wear a diaper. The mares are quite smitten with him because he is only one in the barn that is not neutered.

http://www.jigidi.com/created.php?id=KGRPTAGK

unclebluebottle

Have you picked your carrots from the tree yet, Mr.Carrot-Grower?.......

Robbiel

You look ravishing this evening Mrs. B!!

patsquire

Oh sure, throw my past at me! The eyes have it, if that's any help to you Mr. Supersleuth. But I'm not giving you a hand, or a leg up, or a shoulder to lean on. You'll have to stand on your own two feet, hips level, arms akimbo and playing it close to the chest, Sherlock. I've been told (by the Robster) that you don't know your nuts from your carrot, whatever THAT may mean (heh-heh) but it'll take more skull work than you're capable of before you mouth off about me, Mr. Funny Ears!

lelabugosi

Mr.Le-Squirt.......Of course the perp could be you, but that would be too simple wouldn't it?........Mind you, I have just had a cursory glance with my cursor, at your profile, where you state in a statement, and I quote:- "I am a retired international arms dealer".........Does this mean that you used to deal in body parts?........Did you or did you not also deal in legs, as well as arms maybe, perhaps, also as well?......And could this dealing extend as far as EYES for example?.........I think the public should know.....

patsquire

I once knew an old bag who liked to take assaults on her dignity standing up, in an alley. You meet all kinds when you serve the female public through 1-800-555-getlucky, you know.

patsquire

So there's an unknowed vandalistic suspect whom ran out the back door. WELL IT WASN'T ME! No sir! I was in Cleveland. My mother was sick, and she needed her hair washed, laundry done and beds made, so IT WASN'T ME! When did all this happen, by the way? Because I may have been in Cincinnatti, too, if necessary. So let's have some specifics on dates and times, because how else is a man supposed to get his alibi ready? I ask?

MrsBugosi

I have never seen this man before........is he a grocer?......

lelabugosi

Well!....What to say?........So Mr.Carrot admits being the person personified in the photo, but denies being the vandalous vandal committing this heinous atrocity upon my very nice image!.......AND he insults our illustrious david-many-numbers! He even says that is a torch beam!.........I believe he is in Bonga-Bonga to photograph/steal our carrots!........

david06520

My!

Robbiel

David you need some new medication mate........LOTS OF IT!!!!! Now, let's get this story straight, that is ME! Mrs. Bugosi offered me a part time job as a security guard while Lela was away in Denmark arranging for some new type of seeds to grow in Bonga-Bonga. Kind of a lost cause because he doesn't know his nuts from his carrots!! Anyway, I heard a noise and ran into the room where someone was standing in front of this ghastly painting.........they turned and I noticed something in their hand touching the painting around the eye and the hooded perpetrator ran out of the room. I quickly shone my torch on the area (Laser would be narrow red beam!) then ran off after the person running away! The idiot ear-witness was obviously watching a movie instead of monitoring the webcam and tried to frame me because I am new and he has been looking at my puzzle comments.

SO OLDBAG.........I say if you won't lie down and take it...........STAND UP!!!!!!!

Witzend

Looks familiar, is it Robie Wan Kanobie?

david06520

Good thing the camera had film in it otherwise we wouldn't know him whom was responsible for this vandalry.

lelabugosi

Well whoever he is, he certainly has a grudge!........(and a dangerous laser-torch-thingy).......

gemstone

It's like playing "Who Am I?" There is something very familiar by the distorted face...I know I should recognize it...just can't put my finger on exactly what it is...

cakes1947

What a dastardly deed he did!! Looks like the Bermuda man's skinny, evil cousin Habama man!! Thanks Lela!! :)))))
(time, 1:27)

lelabugosi

Whoever he is, he is not a real security guard, Hanne.......his hat is too small......
No, I don't see anything odd about the painting.....just that now it has only one eye.....

Elfie

RISE OLDBAG RISE - but actually why don't you check out people before you employ them??? He is a security guard isn't he??? Perhaps he felt that the painting wasn't a safe one?? Something odd about it???