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Sometimes words cannot express feelings

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puzzeljac

Ik had wat computerproblemen waardoor ik even niet zoveel online was. Daardoor had ik dit vreselijke nieuws gemist. Jongen wat spijt me dat voor je. Ik weet hoe hard het is je geliefde maatje te moeten missen. Ik vind het heel erg voor je. Ik begrijp dat je er niet over kunt praten. Dat komt later wel. De pijn zal slijten maar vergeten doe je hem nooit. Ik wens je heel veel sterkte en probeer je wat troost te sturen. Knuffel.

pkin38

Starlord Danny hope this day is a little better for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers. Your friend Pat

mpilnadyful

Just came in to jigidi and I'm devastated for you. The love of a dog is so pure and freely given. Like many, I've had to make that decision too - the decision to cut yourself off from all but the memory of that love - in order to give him peace and freedom from suffering. None of us would feel the lose if we hadn't experienced the delight and devotion of our bond. Not now, but in time, I hope you will be able to focus on and just celebrate the experience of the gift of his life shared with you.

starlord

Thank you all for your comforting words. They mean a lot to me and are highly appreciated.

jojosmom417

Starlord, Libby is correct--we do know the pain you are feeling now. I had to make that terrible decision about my little Sparkie on New Year's Day, 2003, and I still grieve for her. Please know that all of us here at Jigidi care for you and I pray that you find peace in knowing that you did the only thing you could have done. Witse will always remain in your heart and is now free of the pain he had before, and that is a blessing. May God give you comfort and peace. Sherry

bookish

Starlord, apologies for using your puzzle to leave a message to Libby.
~Libby, I am so sorry to hear that. I know how much Dulcie meant and still means to you.

javasage

Oh starlord, so many of us DO know exactly what you are going through! Just 5 weeks ago today I had to do the same thing for my sweet Dulcie...just 1 month shy of 4 years old. I kept praying I would not have to make the decision, that she would leave me when she was ready, but knew deep down in my heart I could not keep her here one moment longer because I did not want to let her go. You agonize, argue with yourself and the God of your understanding, and ultimately know it is the right thing...the only last kindness you can do. My heart aches for you, know you will be in my thoughts and prayers for as long as it takes for this crushing pain to ease...it will, I just can't tell you when...the process is different for each of us...no right, no wrong...just our own.
It is hard to think about another dog right now, when your heart is so full of grief for the one you just had to let go of, maybe someday, maybe not...you will know if , or when it is time. Try to be gentle with yourself...Libby

Nellies

Starload, your feelings came through to everyone who has, or even has not, experienced the loss of a little loving family creature. We lost two to cancer iwithn three months. One of them was "mine" and I loved her so. At night, in the darkness, I talk to her. This brings some comfort. She lies in our yard under a little kitty headstone. Your tribute to your little Witse is beautiful and your grief is understandable. Keep the faith Starlord. You will always have loving memories and know that you did what was best for your little Witse.

JiggyBelle

It's all been said, Starlord. I, too, cried and felt your pain over all these miles. No one who has ever had a loving dog, can help but feel so very sad. I am sorry. Save up on the memories. You will never forget Witse!

gemstone

I had to leave after reading your posts as the pain was too close...and wipe away my tears. I am so sorry for your loss. Both our little dogs were rescue animals. Our first was guessed at around 12 years old. Her little flea collar had "Candy" printed inside. We had her for nearly seven years. We missed her so much that we adopted Coffee nine months later. She was my soul mate. Just one year old we were together for almost 13 years. She was jumping for her dinner up to one hour before a heart attack brought on by metastasized cancer. We let her go barely four hours later...so she did not suffer as much as your little one but like you, we had a heart-breaking decision to make...and that's what love is...perhaps not wanting to but always doing what is best for the one you love. We have been able to smile more this past year but, again like you, our age is a consideration in adopting again. Perhaps we will foster rescued pups in a while and try to give them a loving start at a forever home.
Take time to grieve and be good to yourselves. Blessings, Faye

pkin38

Starlord I know just how you feel about getting another dog. Thats just why we didn't get another one. Just too old and someday may not be able to care for it. Did you post any pictures on facebook. If so could you give a link? If not I understand.

starlord

You are all so sweet, understanding and helpful. I don't think however we'll go for another dog. It was our first and our last. We are both 60+, and we don't have eternal life. I don't want us to get a dog in the pound and then returning him because we arer both ill or unable to look after him. No matter how strong my love for animals is. A dog is for life.I don't want to put any dog through the ordeal of a pound ever again. I know that when I go see the dogs in the pound, it'll be stronger than myself and I'm bound to leave with one or two. What we agreed to do is bring his belongings (leftover of food (3 kilo's) his sleeping basket, his leach and brace, his feeding dock, all the tools we had, comb, brush, nits catcher to the dogpound. They may be of use there and we.... well, we have no more need for them.

morris186

Please do not apologize for your comments. They are fine, just remember that witze is at peace now. And feel free to post more puzzles of him. It may do you good.

Starlord, with tears in my eyes I want to tell you how sorry I'm for your loss. Please know that your little darling, as he loved you so much, would like for you to share your great love with another unfortunate little doggie, as he was before you rescued him. Please, please go to the dogpound and look around for another little one that needs that boundless love you have to give. I know that nothig could replace him but another little one could offer you some solace. Your little one is at peace thanks to your great love and courage. Please don't feel guilty because your decision to put him down, ripped your heart out but you only did it for his wellbeing, not many people would have done what you did. I know that your action was carried out out of love for your dear doggie. Please take my advise and think how happy you would make another destituted little doggie.

God Bless you and give you strenth.

Umjassim (mother-of-jassim)

chickiemama

Dearest starlord, I am so sorry for the loss of a dear sweet friend/family member. Please don't apologize. I know from experience that this puzzle and comments will help you through your grief. I too have tears because it takes me back to when I lost my pet in June. Please know that we are your friends and are here to listen and to support you. Hugs

snooker

So sorry.

bookish

Starlord Danny, I'm glad you shared anecdotes about your Witse. I can see how close you were and how Witse had a great life with you.
..Francine

starlord

Continuing; I have the urge to look at my left side. Me at the pc and him happily by my side.When I got up to walk to the living room, he followed me. When I lay under my fleece in the couch, he jopped on an duddled in my lap. When we were sleeping and for some reason he heard gunshots in the distance (hunting season) he hopped on the bed and he hopped on us. Waking us up as if to say: Alarmmmm, we have to get out of here. He always jumped for joy when we took the leash to take him for a walk. He love running on the beach, chasing seagulls (never caught any though). Daily, complete strangers came to us, asking what dog it was and if they could pet him. In his short life, he gave people so much pleasure. He was not keen on other dogs and was always grawling at them and was in attack mode. The happiness he felt when he had been alone for a couple of hours. He then started barking, to tell us off, because we had dared to leave him alone. He was part of the family, part of the pack that we were in his eyes. And if the pack was not colmplete, he would not eat nor drink till we were complete again. He could sit hours in front of the door, waiting. But we did very hard our best to make sure that he was never alone too long.. Doing the shopping was not done together. If one had to go somewhere, the other stayed at home. He had severe separation anxiety. We got him in the dogpound and he was some 8 mnths old then. It was abandoned dog, stray on the roads. Thus we have had no information about him at all. Not even a fate or year of birth. His age was always guessed by vets. But he was the sweetest ad cutest dog and ... he was mine. Hell, he even was obediant when he felt like it :-)
I'm sorry for this long text, but please, it's my way of dealing with this right now. It's the only means I got. I even posted an orbituary notice on Facebook. Thanks for listenin to the story of a grieving man.
Please don't be alarmed if there are no puzzles from me for the coming days. I'm still grieving and have absolutely no need to tease people or make fun. Understandable. But I'll be back, asap. Promise.
Would you like to see some more images of my Witse and me, just drop your e-mail in an old puzzle of mine. I'll find it with 'sort by recent comments'
Thanks for listening and I hope it wan't too boring. If it was, just report it. Or tell me, and then I'll delete it. This was just made for my own peace of mind. Assuring me that I did the right thing by asking the doctor to put him to eternal sleep. Scared of hearing that in the next couple of weeks a cure will be found. Maybe Witse would forgive me for sure, but I would never be able to forgive myself. Thanks from an old man who can empty the pain in his heart in these comment.
Starlord Danny

riveroad

Hugs and more tears, SL. :-((

pkin38

Starlord my heart goes out for you. I too know how hard it is to do this. How it hurts. I also shed tears reading your post. If anyone reports this puzzle then they never ever had a heart. Will be thinking of you. Thanks your friend Pat

morris186

Why would any one be offended by this. It is a very warm and heartfelt thing you did here starlord. I also shed some tears for you. You did what you had to do! Hang in there!

grannygoatlady

I type this with tears in my eyes for you and your companion. There is nothing quite so pure as a dog's love.....or an act as selfless and compassionate as letting him go when it's time......

starlord

Damn, how I miss my little friend, who passed away some 3 hrs ago... I would gladly have given my last dime if that could have saved him. But noone could save him. He had a heartcondition and hisd lungs were filling up with water. A dog like this (Yorkshire) breaths 32 times per minute. Today he was breathing 84 times a minute. He was getting no air. We hurried to the vet, just as we did Friday. He then got a shot that made him better for a couple of hours. We were over the moon. For a few weeks now, things went worse. Looked and seemed like he was choking due to the fluid in his lungs..Operating was impossibe.And then and there we hadto make the horrible decision: Shall we stop his suffering for the last days (weeks at the most), or shall we give another injection that will help him thtough the next couple of days. Only running the risk that he will suffocate and that there is nothing we can do about it. We were incredibly close. Where I was, he was by my side, even at the pc when I was doing puzzles. We did not do trips abroad, as I didn't want him in a small cage in the back of a plane. So we went to the seaside in Belgium and rented an appartment where dogs were allowed. He was part of our family, nothing more, nothing less. My son and daughter called him :'our little brother'. I would like to offer $ 10.000 to anyone if he could only grant me one more walk with him. One more tug of war play. If there was any chance that he could have gotten better, I would spend my last dime on it. Maybe they do open heart transpants on smaller animals in the States, but not here. So I was forced to make a decision that broke my heart. I had to let him put to sleep. He went calmly and quietly in my arms. I saw and felt him getting weaker. He couldn't stand up anymore. All the time, I held him ever so close to my body. The last thing he did was lick my nose. That was his way of giving a kissie :-) Or was it gratitude this time? I'm afraid I'll never know. The last three hours, I shed more tears than in the last 52 yeas of my life. I had to take a mild sedative myself.
Next Saturday, we have a gig with the band. I hope I'll be able to play it and I offer it to him as a tribute for being the good dog he always was. I would have gladly swapped my pc for my doggie. If I was convinced that he would get better, I would gladly have taken the needle myself.
If anyone is offended by my words and .puzzle, I aplogize. It's not meant to offend, it's to show my feelings that I have now. Feelings of pain and suffering. I hope you all understand that and don't 'report' my puzzle. Thanks all for your support. I honestly and really do appreciate it. People I've never even met are standing by my side. Thank you !!!

texasstar7

Oh, Starlord, this made me cry, too! I'm so sorry you lost your best friend. I wish I could help! You did the right thing.

cevas

Dear Starlord, usually your puzzles make me laugh. This one made me cry. We are thinking of you and standing with you at this time. Cathy

pdevredis

I am so very, very sorry, Starlord! That is one of the most painful acts a human ever has to perform for a loved one--it takes so much strength and compassion and a willingness to let peace come even when it means loss comes as well. Take care, and take time to grieve--your friend deserves that, as you deserved his love!

SueJ999

Beautiful sentiments...